A small shift in perspective

I am definitely not any kind of a complete expert in anything.  I get "spazzy" and have to calm myself down. Things upset me, and sometimes I cry randomly. I know I annoy people, because I annoy myself.  But, I really care about people, and I'm limited in how to manifest that into "real" sometimes.  I am busy.  Very busy with the chores and duties and things required for caring for my wonderful family.

But when life grabs me in a bad way, and I get all negative, and feel like relationships are failing me and I'm a lost cause, I always seem to remind myself of a couple of things.  Number one, if you stop being positive there is absolutley no way you can have positive results, so, self talk "stop it Julie, don't focus on his/her/its negative issues but shift your perspective.  Like, my husband takes incredible care of himself to keep his cholesterol down, he wants to be phyiscally healthy.  I think his athleticism is really pretty remarkable because I've never been athletic.  or, He gets these amazing reviews every year, and raises happen,  even when not everyone is getting them, he has a good job and works very hard at what he does. (Quality Engineer for Breast Imagining equipment company) and what he does at work, helps to save lives.  Thats pretty cool.

When something is really biting at you, shift your perspective, let it go.  How hard is that, to let it go?  It's not really hard when you just shift your perspective just a little bit.

Number two, Be present in this moment.  Stop. Breathe. Breathe again, slower. Do a mindfulness exercise and get your brain to slow down, and JUST BE.  Just breathe.  Find some inner peace and block out the noise in your brain.  Physically, your stress diminishes, your mood improves, and you can accomplish so much more, or nothing at all.  But be present in the moment.  and Let it go.

and Number three, forgive.  Forgive yourself for being critical of others and yourself, and others for hurting you, forgive and it flows right into the "be present" thing.  The only way to inner peace is to be able to forgive and move forward.  Holding grudges, and resentment only hurts the person who is holding.  We hurt ourselves by doing this.  Forgive, and find more reasons to love.

It certainly is not easy, to do these things in this terrible messed up world we live in, but its totally possible to be happy and to choose to be happy.

Even more IMPORTANT is the ability to develop the COPING skills that you need to engage in when you do get stressed out, angry, freaked out, hurt, resentful, and so on.  Finding a way to redirect your mind and your soul, back to a place where you can choose happiness.

Sometimes I read what I write, and listen to what I say, and I really don't like myself.  It is because I have this knack of just letting it all come out when it happens. Like a big whining and complaining baby on a rant at life.     But in doing that, I discover who I am, and who I want to be, and don't want to be.   I am perfectly happy with the fact that I am NOT perfect and have alot of my own personality flaws.  I very proud of myself for seeking help professionally when I feel I am incapable of choosing happiness.

Take the worst thing about yourself, and replace it in your brain with the best thing about yourself.  Do that with your husband, kids, dog, whatever.   A small shift in perspective can change your world.